Hopelands

My brother Sam and his girlfriend Hillary were here over the weekend. Sam got to meet Claire for the first time and was enthralled with how tiny she was! We joked that this picture looked like Sam and Hillary with their child :)

We took them to Hopeland Gardens to enjoy the beautiful weekend. We also decided to get some family pictures while we were there. Claire slept through the whole time, but she still looks cute!

First family portrait!

I love my little girl!

I'm trying to hide behind Cole so you won't notice my still-pregnant-looking self. Nine months to gain, nine months to lose, right?!

Awwww! We really enjoyed them.

And lastly, we had to capture Sam almost pushing Hillary into the fish pond.

Great weekend!

Little pooper

Yep, I'm writing about my daughter's poopy diapers. Great topic, I know. Today she had three of them. And they weren't just little squirts in the bottom, oh no, they were massively gross. Her last one she decided to do right at dinner. She was sitting in the little baby rocker that we borrowed from the Spencers and Cole noticed that there was something brown on her outfit. I lifted her up and discovered to my horror that it had leaked out of her diaper, her onesie, and was rapidly staining my favorite outfit of hers. (Don't worry Danielle, we caught it before it went any farther.) It was so bad, I ended up just giving her a bath to make sure that she was fully clean. She is now blissfully asleep while I scrub her clothes so they won't stain. Here's to hoping she doesn't decide to grace us with anymore today. It's funny though... only at this stage of life can she do things like that and still be thought cute. Only as a baby can you yawn, hiccup, poop, fart, or sneeze and have other people just think you're adorable.

Enjoy it while it lasts Claire!!!

Life at home is....

Well, let's just say interesting. I never realized how hard it is adjusting to caring for a baby 24/7. It's not that they're all that hard... it's more the surge of emotions that have overwhelmed me and made me over-protective, nervous, and so incredibly in love with this little girl. Also, the sleep deprivation doesn't help :) I remember saying to a friend a few weeks ago, "I don't think I'll be one of those moms that can't listen to her baby cry. I've had tons of experience with crying babies and I really don't think it will bother me. I'll be able to put her down and let her cry it out." HA HA HA! Oh, how naive I was! The minute she makes a peep, I'm running over to make sure she isn't choking, throwing up, or hungry. And when she cries! Oh gosh, when she cries and I can't comfort her it tears my heart out. Who knew such a little person could affect me this much?! It's crazy and wonderful. Sometimes Cole and I just stare and her and tell her how cute she is. Of course, once she's old enough to understand us, we'll stop so we don't make her vain :) But for now it's so great to love on her. We can't thank God enough for giving us such a precious gift!

Here are some great pics Dana (known hereafter as Dee) took:

Baby Claire

Now that I'm finally feeling like a real human being again, I thought I'd post my delivery story for those of you interested. Trust me, it was far from what I'd planned and hoped for, but I'm so thankful that Claire is safely here!

It started out on Wednesday. Cole and I got to the hospital at 11 am thinking we'd have a baby by that night. HA! I was immediately put on monitors and confined to the bed. The doctor (not mine - she was sick) got there at about noon to insert the Cervadil. Basically it's a cervical ripening agent meant to thin out my cervix, which was still about two inches thick at that point. What I didn't know was that it had to stay in for 12 hours! So naturally I was disappointed to find out that I wouldn't even be given Pitocin until midnight. But Cole and I sat there with my parents and tried to entertain ourselves. Midnight came and the nurse took out the Cervadil and started the Pitocin drip. I slept very fitfully but didn't feel any contractions all night. When the doctor got there on Thursday morning, he checked me and said that my cervix was still too thick. So guess what? He inserted more Cervadil - which meant 12 more hours of just sitting there in the most uncomfortable bed in the world with annoying monitors on me. Once again we made the best of it and my family kept me company as we waited. By that point I was just annoyed and disappointed and could no longer feel my rear. The nurses kept apologizing for the bed - they said the labor and delivery beds were made to hold up under the pressure of woman in labor, not be comfortable.

Early on Friday morning, at about 3 am, the nurse started me on Pitocin again, hoping this time I was ready to start contracting and opening up. This time I could feel cramps, so I was encouraged. At about 7 am the doctor checked me again and said I was thinned out and ready to go! Wahoo! At that point I was only dilated about 2 cm, but still, it was looking like the baby would come that day! My doctor arrived at 9 to check me and was really encouraging. By about 10 am I was dilated to 4 cm and was so uncomfortable and worn out after being there for three days that I caved and asked for an epidural. I had intended to try without drugs, but I realized that I was so mentally exhausted that I wasn't ready to handle the pain for hours and hours. The anesthetist was a really cheery older man who was quick, so by 11 am I was feeling absolutely wonderful. It was amazing how my mood went from annoyed and tired to completely relaxed and bouncy. My dad sat there watching the contractions on the monitor, telling me when they were really bad, and it was so fun to not feel a thing!

My nurse checked my progress again at about noon and I was dilated to 9 cm. At that point Cole and mom were out in the waiting room eating lunch and just my dad was in the room with me. He called my mom and told her they should hurry and finish up because I was getting close! Just as we got all excited about the possibility of delivering within a couple of hours, my nurse, Carly, came in and said that the baby's heart rate had dropped too low. She wasn't worried at that point because she explained that most likely the cord was wrapped around her (as it is with most babies she said) and I just needed to change positions to help loosen it. So went on one side, and then the other, and then all the way on back but there was no change. At that point other nurses were coming in to offer help and it was making us nervous. Carly looked a little worried and said I might be looking at a c-section if her heart rate didn't come up soon. Cole still wasn't in the room, so my dad went running to get him. My doctor wasn't there either and the nurses had started talking about what to do if she didn't make it in time. Thankfully she got there at about the same time Cole did. She accessed the situation in about a minute and said we didn't have time to wait.

Before I knew what was happening, she was "reading me my surgery rights" or whatever it is she was obligated to say before cutting me open, and they were wheeling me toward the OR. Cole tried to come with me, but my doctor explained that it was an emergency situation and he wasn't allowed in the room. I barely had time to squeeze his hand as I was whisked out of the room, but I could see the concern on his face. I think my dad had scared him when he told him the baby was in distress. I was on the operating table before I knew it and they were asking me if my epidural was still strong enough to operate with it alone. (Most epidurals start wearing off at about 3 hours. Mine was going on 4 and I could tell the feeling in my legs was coming back.) My doctor was pinching my stomach asking me if it hurt. I could feel the pinch but didn't know if it hurt or just felt like pressure. An anesthetist was at my head asking me if she was going to need to put me out or if the epidural was still strong enough. At that point I was scared because I didn't know if it was but I didn't want them to have to wait for more pain meds to kick in while Claire's heart rate was still down. I just told my doctor cut me open before I could think about it too much. Thankfully the hurt wasn't red hot like I was afraid it might be, but it still hurt and I felt the pressure of them pulling and pushing everything apart. Simply put: it was awful! I never want to feel those sensations again!

Amazingly to me, Claire was out within two minutes. I heard them pull her out but didn't hear her cry for a minute, which scared me to death. I had horrible thoughts of her being dead or hurt and those seconds felt like forever. When I did hear her cry, I lost it and start bawling! My whole upper body was shaking as all the anxiety and relief overwhelmed me. The nurses kept saying "She's ok! You have a beautiful baby girl" but I just couldn't stop crying. Cole got there at that point and as he knelt next to the table I could tell he'd been crying too. When he finally got to hold Claire and bring her over to me, we just kissed her and cried together. It was the most emotionally overwhelming moment of my life thus far! Turns out her umbilical cord was all over her and as she descended into the birth canal, it had tightened, causing the heart rate drop. Praise God that she is perfectly ok!

The next days were a blur. I felt like I'd been hit by a tank and ended up staying till Sunday recovering. (The beds in post-partum are way more comfortable, so no complaining there.) My mom was with us at home for a week and helped me get back in the swing of things. Claire is a pro at nursing and though I can't seem to figure out what schedule her internal clock is on, we're working on this parenting-thing and so far it's a joy! I've never been more emotional in my entire life and I'm already developing new-mom syndrome, but hopefully once my hormones get right, I'll relax! Just don't ask to hold her anytime soon :). She's all mine and I'm not sharing her! (Except with Cole of course.)

So that's the story. Claire Ann Nickell was born Friday, January 22 at 1:48 pm, weighing 7 lbs. 2 oz., measuring about 20 inches and sporting the most beautiful heart lips! We're so thankful for all the prayers and encouragement from our friends and we praise God for working out all the details, even if it wasn't the way we planned it.